Off the Record

No, it's not your imagination. Rock bands in this My-Space age are getting ridiculously young - this week's top tip is the Tiny Masters of Today, whose drummer is 11 years old.

Which makes it all the more surprising that Britain's dance scene - once a hotbed of teenage acid-house rebellion - is still dominated by the same grizzled old disco dinosaurs. Last week's Wireless Festival was headlined by Daft Punk, who've been plying their housey trade for some 15 years, and Faithless, whose frontman, Maxi Jazz, is about to celebrate his 50th birthday. Rave on.

But the oldies' monopoly on dance music is now under threat - a youthful assault is being led by Calvin Harris, an endearingly cocky 23-year-old from Dumfries. "The same old people have been headlining the festivals for years," he complains. "How can people still get excited about that?"

A few months ago, Harris was stacking shelves at a supermarket, and fiddling with production equipment in his bedroom during his spare time.

Now the young upstart has a top-10 single under his belt, Acceptable in the Eighties, a track celebrating those born in that decade because "it taps into the crucial 16-26 market".

His debut album, out last week and modestly titled I Created Disco, has prompted invitations to write for Kelis and Kylie. A frantic summer schedule includes slots at Glastonbury this weekend, T in the Park and Bestival. "I'm not even remotely concerned that I can't prove myself," he swaggers. "I'm good at making tunes."

Harris's sensibilities may be at the pop end of the scale, but even purists on the dance scene are convinced of his importance. "After 20 years of dance culture, it's worrying that we're still falling back on the same old stadium-dance acts," remarks clubland publ i sher and artist manager Ben Turner. "Harris is a breath of fresh air, and it's really refreshing that people of his age are now setting themselves up as performing acts."

Although few other young dance acts have translated their music into a viable live show, London's blog-based electro scene is a hotbed of DJ-ing talent, with acts such as Skull Juice and Diskoboxx poised to follow in Harris's wake. Kissy Sell Out is a 22-year-old producer whose compulsively danceworthy electro squelches and big, joyous personality have earned him slots at this summer's Creamfields, Lovebox and Glastonbury festivals. He's recently remixed Mark Ronson, All Saints and Gwen Stefani.

Old ravers like me may still rejoice at the sight of other mature revellers in clubs. But as I concluded recently when wrestling with my conscience about whether to buy a ludicrously cheap shirt that was most likely stitched together by an eight-year-old seamstress, just because I benefit from something doesn't make it right.

Calvin Harris has put the ageism back into dance music, and to be honest, it's about time.

Hang the celebrity DJ

First it was pop stars. Then it was actors. Now it seems the former girlfriends of royals want in on the celebrity DJ-ing act. Reports this week that Kate Middleton and her friends managed to gain access to the turntables at legendary Ibiza nightclub Pacha, show the stakes continue to rise in this game of nightclub idiocy.

Madonna set the ball rolling two years ago when she turned up at New York's Luke & Leroy and took a turn on the decks, and in typically modest style, played several of her own songs. Lindsay Lohan got in on the act a few months ago by taking part in an "all-star celebrity DJ spin-off".

The trend has little to do with a desire to share the gift of music and more to do with egomaniacs desperate to proclaim their superiority over the common people by any means necessary. A skilled DJ can bring even a drug-free dancefloor to a state of euphoria - something a paying crowd has the right to expect. A silly celeb can ruin that atmosphere in a flash.

Here in London, each passing week heralds new disco indignities, including a recent appearance at the Islington Academy by Eighties strongman and budgerigar expert Geoff Capes. Is that what you want? My campaign to get celebrities off the turntables starts here.

New on the Net

To paraphrase Vic Reeves circa 1990, she wouldn't let it lie. Despite years of catty criticism from all angles, Victoria Beckham is still hell-bent on continuing her music career.

Possibly encouraged by hiphopping husband David, or perhaps put in touch by her friend, rap mogul Damon Dash, Posh has recorded a collaboration with rap legend Nas, entitled Full Stop. It's an extraordinary pairing. Even more amazing: the song's rather good. CLick here to have a listen

There's a wee treat for Travis fans on MySpace right now. 3 Times and You Lose is taken from their recent album The Boy With No Name. It's not scheduled for release as a single, but that hasn't stopped the big dafties from making a video for it.Enjoy the boys' antics here

Jovial up-and-coming songmongers-The Hoosiers have just released their debut single, Worried About Ray, available on download only. It's a quirky, summery piece of Sixties-style psychedelic pop. Click here to see the amusingly retro video for the track and marvel at the lead singer's uncanny likeness to Ben Stiller on the group's site