Tin Goose is a lame duck

The most recent example was a remark by Elizabeth Perelstein, the co-founder of a new British school in Manhattan that's been dubbed 'Hogwarts on the Hudson'. When asked by a reporter whether she'd be serving toad-in-the-hole and spotted dick in the school canteen, she said: 'We'll be fortunate not to have British food.'

What are you going to feed the little Harry Potter lookalikes, then? Hot dogs and root beer?

Still, it's hardly surprising that foreigners cling to this stereotype, given the paucity of good restaurants at Britain's airports. Gourmet magazine recently declared London 'the best place to eat in the world', not least because it offers such a huge variety of different cuisines, yet you wouldn't know it from passing through Heathrow.

Chicken tikka masala may be the nation's favourite dish, but there isn't a single Indian restaurant at the country's flagship airport - or, indeed, any ethnic restaurants in any of the seven airports operated by BAA, unless you count Pizza Express.

Given that 65 million passengers now pass through Heathrow each year, and given that the average time each passenger spends airside is an hour and 20 minutes, you'd think there might be room for one decent restaurant. But apparently not. Burger King, Bagel Street and TGI Friday's are still the order of the day.

I called up the BAA press office and asked them to recommend one of the 75 bars and restaurants they oversee at Heathrow and they came up with The Tin Goose. This, it turns out, is a comparatively recent arrival at Terminal 1 and claims to be Britain's first airport-based gastropub.

I have to confess, I was quite impressed. A real live gastropub? OK, it was owned and operated by Geronimo Inns rather than Marco Pierre White, but it was a step up from Garfunkel's.

Perhaps BAA had finally come up with a restaurant to match the marvellous shopping opportunities available at Heathrow. After a brief canter round Chanel, Gucci and Hermès, international business-class passengers could relax over some well-cooked British fare at The Tin Goose. I couldn't wait to try it.

Needless to say, it had about as much in common with a gastropub as the six Wetherspoons located at Heathrow. In terms of appearance, it was indistinguishable from Pret A Manger, Café Rouge, Franklins of Boston or any of the other bog-standard cafeterias that constitute Heathrow's 'upmarket' food outlets.

The cuisine is even more lamentable, if that's possible. I ordered a starter of asparagus risotto, only to be told it wasn't available that day, so opted for a sausage, bacon and fried egg butty, which might have been OK if the kitchen hadn't forgotten to put in both the sausage and the fried egg.

For my main course, I tried the chicken and leek pie, which was bland to the point of tastelessness, and The Tin Goose fishcakes, which contained, perhaps, a thimbleful of fish.

The coffee, on the other hand, was excellent - but, then, a good cup of coffee is the one thing you can get at Heathrow, thanks to the presence of two Coffee Republics, four Caffè Neros, five AMT Coffee, five Caffè Italias, five branches of Starbucks and six Costas.

Why is it impossible to get a decent meal at the world's busiest airport? OK, perhaps it's a bit unrealistic to expect Gordon Ramsay to open a restaurant at Heathrow, but there's no reason why Britain's better chains can't be represented.

Why no Carluccio's? Why no Wagamama? Why no Itsu? The BAA press office assured me that the food at Terminal 5, which is due to open in 2008, will constitute a big step up. Until then, the foreign visitors passing through our airports can't be blamed for thinking British food is still the worst in the world.

It's a national disgrace and the people responsible at BAA - who declined to give me a quote - should be thoroughly ashamed of themselves.