Peaches teaches

I don't want to complain to my boss about this because I know I'll sound pathetic and like I can't cope with a bit of office politics but it's driving me mad; I'm starting to feel insecure and it's affecting my work.

I'm in my first year as a solicitor - he started a year before me - and I wonder if he's threatened by my arrival?

Any thoughts on how to get him to stop? I try really hard not to rise and to be nice to him - I even bought him a Christmas present (a comedy mug), against my better judgement...

A The fact he's being deliberately petty means he must either feel threatened by your arrival and believes you're trying to usurp him, or he's just the standard token sexist pig found in seemingly every office.

I would confront him about the situation: if it's making you uncomfortable you should vocalise this, no matter how trivial the issue seems. Chances are he'll be embarrassed, especially if you take him aside and face him one-on-one. If he carries on with his childish behaviour next Christmas, buy him a 'misogynist wanker' mug as opposed to a comedy one. I'm sure he'd get far more use out of it.

Q My husband lost his banking job six months ago and has not yet found another one. He spends his life watching daytime television, and picks fights with me when I get home. I can't bear seeing him with such little confidence in himself but I wish he wouldn't take it out on me. Please help.

A He's been emasculated by losing out on being the breadwinner and his confidence has been dented by his sudden lack of a job he was comfortable in. He's picking fights with you because he's confused, you've taken up his role and stripped him of his alpha-male status even without intending to, and he also doesn't know how to spend all his time since unemployment settled in.

Talk to him about it, ask him how he feels, instead of lecturing him to stop being lazy and irritable and to find another job. Once he's got it off his chest, he may feel better. Men seem to conceal their true feelings unless given the means to express themselves. Be gentle, yet firm, and hopefully he'll remove himself from the warm bosom of Fern Britton.

Q My boyfriend of three years is going travelling for 12 months and I don't know what to do. I won't see him for a year because I don't have enough money to travel and I'm busy with work. We love each other a lot and he doesn't want to break up, but I'm not sure I can handle a long-distance relationship. What would you do?

A I'm sorry to break it to you, but unless you have the kind of archaic, achingly romantic relationship most women only ever experience in trashy novels or ludicrous movies like The Notebook (I walked out of the cinema in disgust), this isn't going to work.

Logistically it doesn't make sense: he's on the other side of the world, you're hugely busy working. That's already an issue, but the fact that you wouldn't be able to see him, touch him, speak to his face instead of the tinny, metallic voice that crackles out of the end of the phone every so often poses a major problem.

Couples are often terrified to allow their partners even a twoweek break for fear they would cheat, so how is a whole year going to work for people who are used to regular sex and companionship?

You have three options: either put the relationship on a temporary hiatus for the year so you don't both go insane; tell him to curb the wanderlust as it's travel or you; or live up to his Notebook dream and be the Rachel McAdams to his Ryan Gosling - twin souls tied together by a love that stretches across the oceans, and bad, bad acting.

Peaches loves...

THE MAY FAIR HOTEL With its late-night room service and ludicrously comfortable beds, it's my second home in London while I'm house-hunting.

BRACE PAINE FROM THE GOSSIP He spoke to me about Terence Koh, Jodorowsky and No Wave for about three hours, and is an amazing guitarist. He's also an artist, novelist and record-label boss - after growing up on a farm in rural Arkansas. Amazing.

KENNETH ANGER I just watched Scorpio Rising and fell in love all over again. The man was a true visionary. Cinema-meets-art perfection.

Can Peaches help? e-mail Peaches your problem on: askpeaches@standard.co.uk