What do you call your hoochie coochie?

My Account
Logout

Create an Evening Standard Account

Use your social network

Save time by using your existing account to sign in to Evening Standard

We'll never share your information or post anything to your account without your permission

Welcome! Sign in here

Use your social network

Save time by using your existing account to sign in to Evening Standard

We'll never share your information or post anything to your account without your permission

Forgot your password ?

Registration

* indicates fields that are mandatory

Email *

Password *

Confirm Password *

First name *

Surname *

Postcode *

Country *

Mobile phone number

Username *

Gender *

Year of birth *

When you sign up...

You will have access to all our online competitions, discounted offers and can post comments on our site.

You will also receive The Weekender newsletter sent every Thursday - it’s full of fantastic offers and ideas for the weekend. You can update your email preferences in your account page when you log in.

Other newsletters and emails

Homes & Property Newsletter - Yes I want to receive the weekly email with all the latest news on property in the capital

Occasionally we would also like to send you relevant emails detailing specific offers either from ourselves or carefully selected partners. If you would prefer not to receive these then please tick the appropriate boxes below. We will never pass on your details.

I do not want to receive additional offers and information from the Evening Standard

I do not want to receive additional offers and information sent by Evening Standard on behalf of carefully selected partners

Terms and Conditions

* I have read, understood and agree to be bound by the terms and conditions of Evening Standard

Registration

Mail Sent for Registration Confirmation.

A confirmation email has been sent. Please activate your account by clicking on the activation link sent in your mail box.

The other day an email dropped into my inbox that caught my attention. The subject heading said: "Why wear your heart on your sleeve when you could wear it on your hoochie coochie?" On my what?

Further reading confirmed that this had come from a PR contact whose client is Ministry of Waxing, which is offering a heart-shaped wax service for Valentine's Day.

So clearly this is the name by which this particular PR refers to her you-know-what. It got me thinking about whether anybody else out there has a peculiar name for their privates (or for their partner's), so I went to ask a few Londoners.

Exceptionally large
Montgomery, 26, writer
"Apparently I call my girlfriend's by horrible names. But mine I call exceptionally large because, well, it's exceptionally large."

Nothing
John, 28, film director
I don't call it anything at all and I don't have a girlfriend so neither does she. I don't usually talk to it.

The burrow
Isabelle, 24, production engineer
I call mine the burrow and my boyfriend's is called Julio Wigglesworth or usually just Mr Wigglesworth. My boyfriend also calls my breasts "dugs" because that's what Alexander Pope called breasts.

Flower bed
Jodie, 20, cabin crew
It's my flower bed, because that's what it is - a pretty flower bed. And it's a better name than a lot of others out there.

Muffin
Ria, 23, product co-ordinator
My boyfriend calls it my muffin. I'm not sure I want to go into the details about why.

Pylon
Jeff, 28, computers
I call my girlfriend's the "nani", short for punani, and she refers to me as pylon.

My bits
Kate, 24, sales rep
When I was a child I used to call it "my bits" but you couldn't call it that now. "Hello, would you like to touch my bits" doesn't really work.

By its proper name
Libby, 26, development manager
I think women are led to believe they should use always some weak and wimpy name - it's ridiculous. I don't think anyone should be afraid of it and everyone giving it funny names makes it into an issue.

Limace
Robert, 30, charity worker
I don't have a name for it myself but an ex-girlfriend of mine who is French would call it "limace", which unfortunately I believe means "slug".