Soccer player's own goal as email to boss wings its way around the City

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When Mike Rolt was asked to change the position he plays in his football team, the manager probably expected a simple reply.

But the 26-year-old former public schoolboy decided to offer him the sort of analysis of his own playing skills worthy of BBC pundit Alan Hansen.

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Today Mr Rolt was in hiding as his frank assessment of his abilities in midfield was the talk of the City after the email was forwarded to thousands.

Mr Rolt, who works in the film industry, was asked by manager James Townley, who runs the team for old boys of Radley College, to think about playing on the right.

His reply was more Grandstand than Sunday morning pub team. "I've thought about this quite hard and I just think that it's a waste of our fittest player," he wrote.

"I know I'm quick and it would be useful out wide but unless George Mac or Tim were playing in midfield, I wouldn't be very involved. Also pace is very effective in the centre as well - for intercepting passes/covering tackles/catching them on the break etc. I am also one of the better tacklers and headers of the ball and am also probably the most vocal.

"Sticking me out on the wing would lose us these attributes. I wouldn't have much running to do and, although I'll beat my man three or four times, the play will get over congested down the left or in the middle and I'll end up starved."

The email went on: "In an ideal world, with everybody fit and available, I would play on the right or even up front where I played with some success at Uni. Steven Gerrard has a good role at Liverpool on the right but with the freedom to roam. "That ONLY works, however, because they have Sissoko and Alonso in the middle - two holding midfielders - one of which can spray the ball around.

"Unfortunately, we don't have the players for this, although Tommy Hodge and Tim would be fantastic. Mark and Han in the middle just doesn't work because they aren't positionally aware enough, get caught forward and distribution suffers - the best example of which is Brentwood last season. We sucked."

Mr Townley, who works for Sky, was shocked at the reaction and wrote: "All I said was you should be playing on the right for the good of the team - and I got this small novel." However, today he was left wondering about the loyalty of his team and said: "I only forwarded it to three people."

One of the recipients of the email wrote: "Sweet god - this is incredible - I'm surprised he isn't playing in the Prem(iership) or maybe England - he sounds amazing." And another added: "I think he should get some professional help, he's clearly insane."

The email is the latest to sweep the City, and comes after 21-year-old Oxford graduate Lucy Gao was embarrassed when her invitation to a birthday party in the Dorchester was sent round the world in the summer.

It told friends to follow a set of instructions to gain access to the celebrations, including: "When asked 'How can I help you?' you reply 'I am here for Lucy's birthday party at the Rivoli Bar'."

 

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