Estate agent decides 'honesty' is the best policy

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Maverick estate agent Julian Bending

Estate agents are often accused of blatant dishonesty for the lavish descriptions of properties they are attempting to sell.

But it is not often an estate agent is accused of lewdness for using near-the-knuckle gags to catch the eye of househunters.

Julian Bending decided brutal honesty and a sense of humour was the best policy when advertising a property for sale.

His pursuit of honesty in his business has seen previous properties branded smelly, ugly, sexy, swanky and butch.

In one description he warned potential customers: 'Dear God, it's difficult to imagine a more disgusting house than this.'

But even Mr Bending may have overstepped the mark with his latest description of for two properties on the market in Glastonbury, Somerset.

One description for a two bedrooms terraced house at £155,000 reads: 'All the charm and poise of a vicar on crack. Hall, cloak room, sitting room, kitchen, bathroom, parking and rear courtyard garden. Suit midget on a budget.'

Meanwhile, an elegant cottage is advertised as: 'An absolute stunner - if this cottage was a woman it would be Denise Van Outen in a rubber suit holding a cold flannel.' Mr Bending, 40, who has run the estate agents for five years, said his blunt descriptions had proved a big hit with both sellers and buyers who were fed up with misleading information from estate agents.

'There's the most incredible strength in honesty,' he said. 'If you get called up by an estate agent and they tell you somewhere is lovely and perfect for you and it's not, they have no trust in you.

'If people ring us up we say: 'No it's horrible, don't bother' if it isn't what they want. People thank us while sellers are also grateful they don't have to bother with people who aren't interested.'

A description for a one bedroom home reads: 'My personal favorite. Delicious as a small bun sprinkled with sugar on the top this place fair glistens with delight. It's smooth and silky with a contempory twist but still holds fast to an ancient value. A must see and cracking investment.'

In the five years Mr Bending has been taking this unconventional approach, the company has only received two complaints.

Both anonymous complaints made to the Advertising Standards Agency but both were ruled to be without foundation.

Mr Bending said: 'I only write these things because they tickle me. Freedom of speech is what this country is famous for and you should be allowed to say whatever you want so long as it doesn't hurt anyone.'

The Diocese of Bath and Wells said it had no objections to the disparaging descriptions of vicars in the shop window.

Spokesman John Andrews said: 'We can't get upset. It's quirky and a bit heavy-handed. We don't need crack to get high. We're reaching for the heavens through spiritual means.'

 

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