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Shock for the married couple who discovered they are twins separated at birth
Last updated at 00:07am on 13.01.08
The siblings had no idea they were related
The harrowing story of twins who were separated at birth and married each other without realising they were brother and sister was revealed today.
When the unnamed couple realised the shocking truth about their relationship, they had their marriage annulled at a secret High Court hearing. A judge ruled the union was legally invalid.
The couple's plight was revealed by the former Liberal Democrat MP Lord Alton, who is fighting for children to have greater rights to know the identity of their biological parents.
The peer, who raised the twins' story during a House of Lords debate on the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Bill, said: "I learned of this heartbreaking story from the High Court judge who dealt with the case.
"We were having a casual conversation about the potential problems for donor- conceived children accidentally marrying each other and he said this could also happen in naturallyconceived children."
The judge told Lord Alton that the twins had been parted at birth and adopted.
Neither knew they had a twin and when they met as adults they did not realise they were related but felt "an inevitable attraction".
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The discovery mirrors a storyline in teen soap Hollyoaks where a brother and sister slept with each other without knowing they were related
It was only after they married, according to Lord Alton, that they became aware of the "appalling" truth and sought to have their union dissolved. Marriages can be annulled in cases where there is a "prohibited degree of consanguinity" - blood relationship.
The case came before a judge, sitting in private, in the High Court Family Division where, according to Lord Alton, "he had to deal with the consequences of the marriage that they entered into and all the issues of their separation".
No other details about the couple, their relationship, or the annulment have been made public but the peer added: "It was appalling for this couple to discover they were married to a close relative.
"And I believe the Government will leave itself open to class actions in the future if it collaborates in keeping information of this kind from children who have been donor-conceived."
Lord Alton and his supporters want the genetic history of a child recorded on its birth certificate.
The matter will be debated next week at the next reading of the controversial bill.
He said: "One of its provisions is to deny the child's right to know about its biological identity.
"This means the state is colluding in a deception. The Government has drawn up legislation that will deny you this knowledge until you are 18. But you could be married by then, or have fallen in love with someone.
"This will lead to these heartbreaking situations.
"If you start trying to conceal someone's identity, sooner or later the truth will out.
"And if you don't know you are biologically related to someone, you may become attracted to them and tragedies like this may occur."
Audrey Sandbank, a family therapist and author of Twins and Triplet Psychology, said the twins are likely to have felt "like soulmates" when they met for the first time because of their shared genes.
"This is a terrible trauma for them. They lost each other as babies and now they have lost each other again. They have been bereaved twice."
Pam Hodgkins, chief executive of the charity Adults Affected by Adoption, said there had been previous cases of separated siblings being attracted to each other.
"We have a resistance, a very strong incest taboo where we are aware that someone is a biological relative. But when we are unaware of that relationship, we are naturally drawn to people who are quite similar to ourselves.
"And of course there is unlikely to be anyone more similar to any individual than their sibling."
Mo O'Reilly, director of child placement for the British Association for Adoption and Fostering, said such an incident was traumatic but very rare.
"Thirty or 40 years ago, it would have been more likely that twins be separated and brought up without knowledge of each other."
But she claimed that there was far more openness today with adopted children about their birth parents and background.
Last year, a German brother and sister who were separated as children and fell in love after being reunited campaigned for the right to continue their relationship. Patrick Stubing was jailed for two years for incest after he had four children with Susan, who by then he knew to be his sister.
The 29-year-old locksmith was given up for adoption as a baby and did not meet his real mother or sister until he was 18.
The couple, who live near Leipzig, claim they fell for each other when their mother died and are fighting to have the laws regarding incest changed.
Reader views (18)
Most adoptees, such as myself, have their original birth certificates sealed upon adoption and are issued an amended one with falsified information on it. Birth dates are often changed, places of birth, times of birth, and the adoptive parents are listed as being the parents of origin. Birth parent relinquishment's and adoptions are often times done in the same vicinity and local. Paths between adoptees and birth parents can happen far more frequently than people realize. Just another reason why adoptees should be able to get their original birth certificates and there should be more transparency in adoption. I had the same scare when I married my husband and I realized his ethnicity, and physical description were exactly same as my birth father, and I knew I had siblings somewhere out there per the adoption courts. But, I have not been allowed my original birth certificate after four court petitions in twelve years. Truth and honesty is the way to go for the health and well being of all parties involved.
- Karen, Dallas, TX USA, 10/11/2010 18:50
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i have a question if you are a twin does it say you are on your birth certificate?
- Mary Humphreys, maricopa arizona
In Washington and California (and maybe other states) it does show on the original birth certificate if you are one of a multiple but when a new birth certificate is prepared at the time of adoption, and the twins are separated, they become single children. There is a totally new birth certificate showing the adoptive parents as the birth parents which I find wrong. I have three adopted children, adopted at birth, and their birth certificates should not reflect that I carried them for 9 months. Something needs to change.
- Lin Mckay, Seattle, WA USA, 08/04/2010 23:09
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Actually, the chance of genetic diseases only increases a tiny little bit, even in relationships with 1st degree relatives - The disastrous outcomes seen with royal families or small island population stem from a whole lot of incest, as it would never be possible in our society because well, most people find it disgusting and growing up together with others (even if they are just best friends and not siblings) cancels out all possible romantic feelings by the time the kids can talk properly. Incest is probably less dangerous for the resulting children's health than smoking or drinking during the pregnancy, and you don't get sent to jail for that.
So I see nothing wrong with such relationships between first-degree-relatives as long as none forces the other. It's another thing if someone violently rapes and permanently traumatizes his underaged daugther or little sister, of course. But these people don't see each others as relatives!
We should be careful not to see it too much from our own perpective. Of course we would find it horrible to marry OUR OWN siblings, because that's the way we are.
And I think it's also horrible to expect adopted parents to tell their children about it from the beginning. They adopted the Kids because they wanted to be called Mama and Papa! Of course, one should tell them by their teenage years (In case of these two, it was obviously to late), but if I was infertile and adopted a child, I'd want him/her to form an attachment to me first...
- Kendrix, Germany, 08/04/2010 13:16
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i do not belived in cousins getting married because i seen it happin*the kids being something wrong with them *
- Boris Murrin, newfoundland canada, 04/04/2010 02:53
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I know this may sound dumb when I say this, but aren't we all related in some sort of way? I mean the first couple was Adam and Eve and they had Cain and Able, obviously one of the two had to start reproducing with Eve or else we wouldn't be here today. I mean let them do whatever makes them happy, its not their fault that they were never told.
- Ashley, United States, 10/02/2010 01:39
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Who cares if they are related or not? As long as they love each other and both consented to be in a relationship, then society and the court have no right to judge them, shame on the general society.
- Frank, Calgary, Canada, 08/09/2009 00:04
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Wow they didn't even know, how is that thier fault??? They are victims of circumstance, still not thier fault, that is why you can't help who you fall in love with, they are good to each other right!?!?! and they have 4 children so now what do they do...Romeo and Juliet was a movie!!! It's not fair to punish someone for falling in love and getting married. It was NOT thier decision to be seperated at birth and have it kept from them...They fell in love TOO LATE...I say leave em alone and let them live thier lives Happily Ever After...Along with all the other people with whom it is too late to make them not LOVE each other!!!! After all don't we have enough to worry about in this WIDE world then to worry about things like people falling in Love (of course I have a different view about it if it were known all along that they were related) Incest after all is against the law!!!! But this is just a SAD LOVE STORY!!!! Shame on the judicial system for jailing this man!!!! Good Luck to EVERYONE who has EVER been victimized by a decision that they had NO controll over at BIRTH!!!!! Life can throw a curve ball but this is ONE HELL of a Fast pitch curve ball. So Sad!!!! Can't change the world right or the minds of people who've already made thier minds up about this being wrong. (Just hope you never have to make a hard decision that effects someone elses life) These two after all were just simply living thier lives and fell in Love with no reguards of hurting ANYONE. Just Fell In Love!
- Chritstine (Davis) Moore, Springfield, Ohio USA, 04/08/2009 01:33
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i have a question if you are a twin does it say you are on your birth certificate?
- Mary Humphreys, maricopa arizona, 07/11/2008 01:43
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I see a greater issue here. The article discusses a young couple. I am concerned about older individuals, those nearing retirement, who discover they are too closely related to remain married. It may be rare for twins or full siblings to not know their backgrounds, but not so for half-brothers, half-sisters and first cousins who do not know their grandparents.
Sometimes, only DNA testing can reveal a common ancestor. In much of the United States and other countries, incest can be a very serious crime, often a felony. A couple married for decades, if they discover they are too closely related, might have to separate and face an annulment of marriage. The American states of Illinois and Utah allow first cousins to marry if they are of a certain age and can not biologically produce children. But such is not the case everywhere.
In 2003, the U.S. supreme court declared legal sexual relationships between consenting adults (inside or outside of marriage), provided they were non-violent, non-incestuous, and did not involve prostitution.
The definition of incest (as a crime) needs to be changed to protect older couples who are planning for a conventional retirement and had no knowledge of any common ancestry that might force their separation.
- Mark E., St. Louis, United States, 15/04/2008 03:11
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Keep it in the family!
- Nobby Clark, Perth, Scotland, 11/01/2008 15:57
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As an adopted person myself this sends shivers down my spine even though I am 99% sure I have no twin. I suggest original copy birth certificates provided to adopted people always indicate whether theirs was a single or multiple birth even if no other details are given.
- Victoria Lavin, Guildford Surrey, 11/01/2008 15:15
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Peter, because marrying your sibling is gross...you need no other reason that that! ( I trust you haven't got a sister, and therefore don't understand the lunacy of your own point).
- Daveb, London, 11/01/2008 15:12
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Am I the only person reading this who can't fathom how "twins" (even if seperated at birth) couldn't recognise some similarities between each other? Or are we supposed to be dealing with a case of twins with the similarities of Arnie and De Vito in the eponymous (and truly dreadful) movie ?
- Micko, Dublin, Ireland, 11/01/2008 15:10
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How awful for both of them. Peter Bench raises an interesting point and I can't think of why, since other 'unions' are now sanctioned - this group have been left out. However, I don't believe for a moment that this type of union would make fitter or more intelligent offspring this is not proven in science, (re steven patrick). It may simply be a taboo but interbreeding for generations is likely to perpetuate existing genetic disorders, whilst breeding outside ones 'clan' weeds out genetic illnesses and, possibly why the myth/taboo came about.
- Natalia Grant, London, UK, 11/01/2008 14:34
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The story isn't clear what would have happened if they had not sought an annulment. So it doesn't show that the law prevents anyone getting married. It shows that the law allows people in this situation to annul their marriage.
And if the answer is about children, I don't understand why you wouldn't want to hear it.
- Ben, Brussels, Belgium, 11/01/2008 14:34
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I didn't really think about that point until reading Peter Bench's comment and I must say I agree with him. I would even go as far as saying that the chilren having defects thing is a bit of a myth, certainly if it was only a couple of generations of interbreeding it could actually have exactly the opposite effect and make a fitter or more intelligent child. This is what has been happening with other animals for years, they have been bred to get rid of certain traits and to emphasise others more.
- Steven Patrick M, London, UK, 11/01/2008 14:00
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How very sad. Perhaps a better solution would have been to stay married and adopt rather than having their own children.
- Rose, USA, 11/01/2008 13:54
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I am not being facetious but can someone please explain why the law (nb I am not dealing here in 'morality' or biology) prevents 2 consenting adults from being married? If men can 'marry' men and the same for consenting women, why does this not apply to any 2 consenting adults? Please don't give me answers about children because I'm not asking that question.
- Peter Bench, London, 11/01/2008 13:15
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