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Author risks fury of millions of women with a claim that THEY are to blame when husbands stray
Last updated at 23:11pm on 31.08.08
It is a philosophy sure to enrage every cheated wife.
A counsellor turned author claims that women are to blame for their husbands' indiscretions.
Psychotherapist Gary Neuman has written a guide to changes that women should make in order to stop their partners from straying.
Gary Neuman has advised women on how to prevent their partners from cheating (picture posed by model)
It is the second book in a week that recommends women take a subservient role in marriage.
Mr Neuman's advice includes always forgiving him, providing sex on demand and taking an interest in his hobbies.
In his book, Advice in The Truth About Cheating: Why Men Stray and What You Can Do to Prevent It, he says a woman should praise her man for providing for the family, even if she earns more than him.
The author, who has been featured on Oprah Winfrey's TV show and in Time magazine, claims his book is 'dedicated to helping wives'.
But not all women appreciated the recommendations.
'This is an appalling book,' said Susan Quilliam, a relationship psychologist and author. 'It's more like dog-training than being in an honest, successful, adult relationship.'
Dorothy Ramsay, chairman of the Association for Family Therapy, questioned whether the book was written as a joke. She said: 'It depends whether you see marriage as so worthwhile that it's worth sacrificing one human being to sustain it.'
Mr Neuman said he was just trying to give women some useful advice.
He questioned 25,500 faithful and unfaithful men and found almost 90 per cent linked cheating to some 'significant dissatisfaction' in their marriage.
He added: 'Men will eventually find their way into the arms of another if they are not getting enough sex at home.'
The Re-education Of The Female, which tells women to follow their man's orders if they want to keep him, has been a recent success in the U.S.
It says that women should wear sexy clothes while doing the cooking and cleaning.
And despite first-time author Dante Moore's chauvinist opinions, copies have been flying off the shelves in America.
One piece of advice reads: 'Here's a little secret, ladies. Men never really ask for anything. They command. And believe me, what you won't do, ten broads around the corner will.'
Reader views (7)
Here's a sample of the latest views published.
FAO: Bruce from London.
Spot on, with insight like yours you should write a book, I would buy it. This book is bound to upset a lot of single bitter women, the ones who want to take no responsibility for the failure of their marriages.
- Mark Hodge, Yateley Hampshire
The reason people stray is an inability to keep their word re marriage vows, be they religious or the secular variety. The promise is quite clear in either, man and woman united, to the exclusion of others.
Failure is usually caused by weakness and selfishness. Becoming a doormat will not promote the self discipline of one's spouse.
- Ca Metcalfe, Essex
Its not rocket science. Most men given the choice would have sex every day of every month of every year and this is regardless of everything else going on in their lives and regardless of whether they had 1 or 12 hours sleep the previous night. Most married women on the other hand seem to lose interest in sex rather rapidly and very soon the relationship reaches the point where the man is the only one initiating it and is also frequently being rejected. Resentment forms, the sex when it happens is forced, the man constantly feels rejected and physically frustrated, a vacuum forms in the relationship and eventually for some men this will lead to a sexual affair.
- Bruce, London
Women have affairs too....
This 'one size fits all' theory is dull.
- Katie, London
Does this work the other way around if the women strays then?
- Rach, london
What a load of codswallop. It's all about the monotony of being with one person only for a long period of time. Men cheat on supermodels don't they?
- Laura, Tokyo, Japan
You can be a wonderful mother but a lousy wife or you could be a lousy mother and a wonderul wife. Oten the secret is keeping the happy balance. It doesn't matter what job they do men need to feel they are in command/driving seat. In Asia men are made to feel wonderful and the provider. They love the compliments and hate being talked down. Western women are often aggressive/self opionated and this is a real turn off. In any marriage the husband must be your centre - the kids second as when they leave the nest he is the one you are left with. He should be your best friend.
- May Tey, Asia
