Football Talk

Style that drives Trevor batty
David Batty may have missed that penalty in the 1998 World Cup, but there is another reason to vilify the former Leeds midfielder, says Sir Trevor Brooking. The Football Association's director of development has singled out his style of play as a poor example to young players and views him as evidence of the weakness of the Prozone-style statistical analysis favoured by managers like Steve McClaren. Brooking told West Ham fanzine Ex: "[The FA] tell me that so-and-so has completed 90 per cent of his passes during a game and the first thing I will say is: 'How many of them went forward?' We can all be a David Batty, where we can pass it to the back four and look great by never giving it away."

Banned for bare-faced cheek
Exhibiting naked men may have worked for Michelangelo but the concept has never taken off in football. Just ask Leyton Orient fan James Russell, recently banned from all British football grounds for three years after streaking at Brisbane Road during his club's 2-2 draw with Brighton. Russell was found guilty of outraging public decency at Waltham Forest magistrates court and fined £1000.

Cole not dancing to tube tune
Ashley Cole remains a pantomime villain for Arsenal fans and it is astonishing the lengths some supporters will go to in order to vent their feelings. Following the detailed 'Cashley' banknotes last year, Cole is now the subject of a professional-standard recording of a highly defamatory song on YouTube. The lyrics are based on false allegations made in newspapers over which Cole successfully sued and received damages and an apology. Cole's lawyer Graham Shear said: "We will be investigating the situation with YouTube and what appears on that site." The song has had 344,000 viewings. YouTube say staff need to be alerted of "inappro-priate material" by users before it can be removed.

Rangers getting into a cat flap
The Italian owners of Queens Park Rangers are purging the club's historic links with black cats. For the last 20 years, a cat named "Jude" has lived at Loftus Road supposedly bringing good luck. But Talk understands the ageing animal has now left the ground and been rehoused with a member of the club staff. As part of the same clear-out, matchday mascot Jude the Stadium Cat, who is based on the real-life feline and has entertained home fans for 10 years, is also under threat. No official reason has been given by Flavio Briatore's regime but that has not stopped speculation. According to animal rights activists, black cats are viewed as symbols of evil and extreme bad luck in parts of Italy with thousands killed every year.

Speedie turning the air Blue
Never work on live TV with animals, children or, it would seem, professional footballers. After Stephen Bywater's Goals on Sunday C-word scandal, Chelsea TV are the latest broadcaster in trouble. Blues hero David Speedie was a guest on last Friday's Big Match Countdown show and couldn't help punctuating his analysis with swear words. However, the programme was screened pre-watershed at 6pm, leading to repeated apologies from presenter Neil Barnett.

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