Now can we nationalise the railways, too, please?

After a week when Mr Brown has barely been off the TV, saving the world, ComRes in the Independent on Sunday showed the Tories nine points ahead, with a modest two-point boost for Labour over its previous Independent poll, and a one-point fall for David Cameron. YouGov in today's Mirror has a one-point increase for Labour. Another firm, BPIX, regarded as less transparent and reliable by experts, put the Tories no fewer than 16 points clear, three up on its previous poll.

It's true that public opinion is like an oil tanker it takes a long time to turn. It's true that the Tory lead in most places is half what it was last month. And it's also true that the very important news narrative is pro-Brown; even yesterday's ComRes, which must be rather disappointing for Labour, was reported by the Independent on Sunday as having "slashed" Cameron's lead.

But, for the moment, even such shamelessly crowd-pleasing moves as the return of Peter Mandelson, let alone taking control of the banks, have failed to produce quite the rewards many were expecting. So in the spirit of helpfulness for which I'm renowned, may I suggest another state power grab which might be more popular.

Now is the moment to renationalise the railways and it has never been cheaper or more possible. Rather like the banks, many of the companies which hold Britain's rail franchises will soon become disastrously over-extended. They have contracted to pay massive sums to the Government for the right to operate trains, assuming that passenger numbers would continue to grow strongly and that fares could continue to rise well above inflation.

In a recession, both those assumptions look highly questionable but the Government has said that franchises will not be renegotiated. What that means, if ministers stick to their guns, is that some of the most justly hated companies in Britain First Great Western, Virgin Trains, SWT will have no option but to give back the keys. The franchises will revert to the state, and it won't cost taxpayers a penny.

The stations, tracks and signals are already in public hands. And thus, with a few exceptions, we could restore the railways to single ownership, a single command structure, and sanity. The only thing holding ministers back is their terror of the N-word but after spending £37 billion on partly nationalising the banks, that Rubicon has surely been crossed.

Last week, in recognition of a crisis even more serious than the economy's, the Government announced a new target of reducing C02 by four-fifths. If we are to meet it, one absolute necessity is a railway that runs as an integrated network, that functions seven days a week and that does not charge you more than it costs to travel by car.

Nice work on the banks, Gordon. But renationalising the railways would mark the real death of discredited Thatcherite neo-liberalism, and millions of commuters would thank you for it.

Sorry Alastair, we still hate you

THE longest case of Stockholm syndrome in the history of broadcasting grinds on, with the BBC giving that twinkly old charmer Alastair Campbell yet another platform to reveal movingly how he was the real victim of the David Kelly affair. Here, Alastair, is a tip: however long you spend pleading with the British public to stop hating you, it simply will not work until you display at least a facsimile of contrition and humility.

Princes' jolly in hard times

AFTER the bank bail-out comes another landmark act of statesponsored reflation to cheer us all up. Are Princes William and Harry, plus protection teams, injecting large sums of taxpayers' money into a desperately needed eight-day motorcycling jolly across South Africa, sorry important charity fundraising event? Earlier, the public purse helped stabilise the hard-pressed Mayfair cocktail-lounge industry, with an emergency spending package of farewell drinks for the boys at the Whisky Mist club. Prince William, by the way, is now 26 years old. Isn't it good to know that, at least for some people, the world goes on just like it always has?