One in five couples admit to 'snooping' by reading each other's texts and emails

One in five of all married couples admit to snooping on each other's emails and text messages, according to a new report by Oxford University.

The survey also found more than one in ten spied on the internet sites their partners visited to ensure they were not cheating.

While many couples said the internet was close to essential for starting and maintaining a relationship, they also admitted it could be a threat by leading to "online infidelity".

This, the respondents said, were as bad as the real thing.

An unsurprising 97 per cent disapproved of their partners falling in love with other people over the net and 85 per cent disliked them flirting.

Around the same amount were unhappy with their partners discussing personal problems online with other people and or having cyber sex.

The report by the university's Internet Institute forms part of a larger project entitled "Me, My Spouse and the Internet" and involved questioning the online habits of 6,012 married couples.

Questions included how and where they first met their partners, their internet use, their online behaviours, and attitudes to these behaviours.

The main findings were that 20 per cent of couples admitted checking each other's online messages and 13 per cent checked their internet histories.

But many also said that the internet was very important in keeping a relationship healthy and important in communicating.

Ellen Helsper, the research fellow who carried much of the survey, said: "We found it quite surprising how many couples check up on each other online.

"I don't think this behaviour is necessarily new - I am sure people checked each other's post in the past - but the internet offers more opportunities.

"Another interesting finding was that couple's found online infidelity just as hurtful as real infidelity. It was considered just as bad.

"However, snooping on each other was not necessarily about checking to see if your partner was cheating. It could also be to keep an eye on their spending."

One in 10 of married internet users indicated that the it was "somewhat or extremely important" in maintaining their relationship with 19 per cent exchanging messages with their partner at least weekly through email and 14 per cent through online chatrooms.

Face-to-face contact remained the most reported way for married internet users to discuss personal matters and resolve problems. But technologies were also increasingly used.

They included telephone (51 per cent of users), text messaging (27 per cent of users), and email (14 per cent of users).

More than four fifths said they never used email to discuss personal matters. The survey also revealed the changing face of dating. Around six per cent of married internet users said they first met their partner online.

Of those, 34 per cent met through an online dating site, 19 per cent in a chat room and 18 per cent through a instant messaging site.

Those who met online were more likely to have different levels of education than those through 'traditional' means and more likely to have an age gap of more than six years.

There was general agreement between partners about the level of acceptability of certain online behaviours within their relationship.

However, there was disagreement within 46 per cent of couples about the acceptability of a partner viewing "adult" sites, with men being more likely to accept this in their partner than women.