Rise of the freemale: The women who'd rather be single than share their lives - News - Evening Standard
       

Rise of the freemale: The women who'd rather be single than share their lives

The number of single women has hit an all-time high, a study has shown  -  and most of them aren't looking for love.


They apparently choose to be alone, and rejoice in a life where they can spend time and money as they wish.

This new breed of singleton has been dubbed a 'freemale', because she chooses her freedom over a family.

Kylie Minogue: Doubts she will ever have a 'conventional' family

Kylie Minogue: Doubts she will ever have a 'conventional' family

Figures from the Office of National Statistics reveal that 8 per cent of the female population aged between 25 and 44 live alone. This equates to some 690,480 women  -  double the number of 20 years ago, when there were approximately 345,000.

The figures coincide with a record low in marriage rates and a rise in divorce rates. And recent research showed that some two-thirds feel that they can enjoy a happy and fulfilled life without a partner. The trend looks set to continue.

Single-person homes will be one of the huge social trends of the next decade or so, accounting for 70 per cent of the growth in households by 2026, official forecasts have shown.

Paula Hall, a relationship psychotherapist with Relate, said many women had been put off relying on relationships for their happiness.

She said: 'There's a cynicism about the benefits of long-term relationships because people have seen lots of them break down.

'If you're busy and fulfilled with lots of close friends, then relationships may seem a bit irrelevant, emotionally high-risk and a lot of hard work. There is also less of an economic need for women to be in relationships than there used to be.

'There is also less of a stigma about not having children. Now, these women call themselves childfree rather than childless.

'Basically, women feel comfortable doing whatever they want to do with their lives.'

Red carpet glamour: Freemale Cameron Diaz

Red carpet glamour: Freemale Cameron Diaz

Several celebrities have led the way, such as Kylie Minogue, 40, and Cameron Diaz, 35.

In a recent interview, Miss Minogue said she doubted she would ever have a 'conventional' family life.

Miss Diaz has commented: 'I love being alone and being by myself. And I'm really good at it, too.

'Not in a weird "leave me alone" kind of way, but I'm just much more comfortable when I'm by myself.'

Dr Jan Macvarish, a sociologist from the University of Kent and author of a research paper Understanding the Popularity of Living Alone, has spent several years studying the lives of single middleaged women.

She claims that changes in society have made it more acceptable for women to remain single for longer, and says the trend particularly affects urban and educated females in professional or managerial roles.

She said: 'We don't see much of the positive side of commitment these days  -  the TV and papers seem full of relationships that end badly.

'And today there is less pressure to be married by a certain age, or to be a mother by a certain age.

'The old pathways of relationships have gone, dissolved.

'This can make it difficult for women. They have good careers and enjoyable lives, so they don't feel there is a gap.

'But you have to weigh that up against how you might feel in the future, which is difficult.

'It's hard to think today, "Well, if I don't have a baby in three years' time will I regret it in five?"

'There are some who have stepped off the relationship conveyor belt, fully intending to get back on it in their mid-to-late thirties but then can't find a partner.'

Older women too, it seems, are also enjoying living alone.

A study funded by the Economic and Social Research Council found that women over 60 who live alone rate their lives as happier and healthier than if they cohabited.

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