Sketch: He stirred the blood, he stiffened the sinews... Now for the rough stuff

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He has endured the background noise men dread. "Nag, nag nag. How could you?" And "Whaddya mean we can't afford a break in the Canaries from 2013?" The task was to combine looking penitent for the turmoil over child benefit, but unwavering in his determination to seize back Middle England's favourite perk.

We embarked on a selective journey through the 2010 election. "The Tories back in the North (what?) winning in Wales (Eh?).

He went to sleep (missing "Samantha and the little ones") but woke up convinced that the country needed leadership and hey presto, Nick said: "Fine, you do that."

This visionary mulch had the audience spellbound.

Sam wore lots of eye make-up, which made her eyes shine as bright blue as a Forties Hollywood screen star. Afghan heroes were lavishly praised. Defence Secretary Liam Fox, looking a bit suspicious as to what this might mean in funding, applauded cooly.

"Nothing has shocked me more than the catastrophic state of the defence budget," he intoned. Mr Fox stared even harder until he heard Mr Cameron promise to renew Trident.

Conference applauded. Lib-Dems threw things at their TV screens.

Dear old Labour got it in the neck for the "catastrophe" in public finances. He castigated the Opposition in a furious, mesmerising rap delivery: "Patronising, top-down wasteful, inefficient, old-fashioned politics — there I've got that off my chest."

Indeed, he enjoyed beating up Labour so much it got a bit too Nuremberg for comfort: "They must never be allowed near our economy again." Careful Dave, that's the voters' job.

But here was the performance of a man who knows that the road to unpopularity lies open before him.

He stirred the blood, he stiffened the sinews, he told us to get off our bottoms and do more for ourselves. They rose as one, loving him for it.

Now for the rough stuff.