Morning:
14°c
Some fares could fall by more than a third when Oyster is extended to every national rail station in London, it has emerged
More...
New Moon is nothing if not an international advertisement for the hungry virtues of virginity and young people can’t get enough of it
The Twilight Saga: New Moon
Theatre
A smart, prickly and rewarding view of sexual and emotional confusion
Cock
Restaurants
Kitchen W8 is a bargain for this area, if such sophistication is what you crave
Kitchen W8
Too long and drawn out but very entertaining with excellent special effects
This is a peculiar play and does not work for me. Some of it is very funny but there are real flaws
Alex has a strong powerful voice and was faultless, she is far better now than she was on the X-Factor
London,
Liz Hoggard's rating
Reader rating
Description: For "sheer class", it's hard -- as PizzaExpresses go, anyway -- to beat the décor of this "opulent" Soho institution (originally established by the ex-chef to Napoleon III), which comes complete with an ("overpriced") champagne bar; its "standard" fare -- from an "extended menu", including burgers -- is "far from a bargain".
Food: 
Service:
Ambience: 
Phone: 020 7734 6112
Website: http://www.kettners.com
Open: Mon-Sun 12.00-24.00
Dress code: To make an evening of it
Good for: Romantic meals, Good food, Ambience.
Payment options: All major cards
Dessert is girl heaven. There are times when you just long to dive into a mille feuille or a slow-melting truffle without all the complex foreplay of a main course and a starter. Growing up in Yorkshire, I adored Bettys of Harrogate, where bossy women in fur coats treated themselves to fancy cakes while their menfolk looked on indulgently.
Today it’s hard to recapture that excitement unless you go through the full afternoon tea experience surrounded by screaming kids. So when I discovered that the new- look Kettners — with an interior by design guru Ilse Crawford — now possesses a Pudding Bar, a girlfriend and I booked in for late-night treats.
It would also be a chance to check out a dire rumour going around town — mostly perpetuated by male restaurant critics — that “They’ve killed Kettner’s!” because the relaunch has not been uniformly applauded.
Kettner’s is Soho royalty. Founded in 1867 by Auguste Kettner, one of Napoleon III’s chefs, it is also one of London’s oldest restaurants. Fans have included Oscar Wilde, Edward VII and Agatha Christie.
In 1980 Pizza Express founder Peter Boizot bought the venue and turned it into a champagne bar and pizza restaurant (run separately from the nationwide chain). Fans loved the shabby chic interior — all dark wood-panelling, velvet banquettes and moulded Edwardian bows — not to mention the slightly camp pianist banging out show tunes.
Then last November, after a three-month closure, it reopened with a brand-new identity. Gone are the pizzas and the piano. In comes a new-look brasserie serving comfort food with a twist: lobster shepherd’s pie, fricassée of rabbit with morels and papardelle — plus the much-anticipated Pudding Bar.
The minute you walk through the door, you realise Crawford’s cream and dove-grey decor is aimed at a more discerning female clientele.Think Soho House meets Ottolenghi.
We started in the Champagne Bar with a glass of Champagne Gallimard Cuvée Réserve Rosé (£9.25 a glass, served in a schooner not a flute anymore, sadly) and a sharing plate of canapés (£10). The fresh crab on sourdough toast was delicious but the mushroom tarts and gougeres slightly cardboardy. Who cared? We were on a sweet mission.
Our disappointment came with the Pudding Bar itself. We expected to be ushered through to a Fragonard-style private dining room. In fact it’s just a marple-topped counter in the main restaurant. Our fantasies of Dessert Heaven crumbled slightly.
It’s a very chic counter and the handsome pastry chef is around to talk you through your choices. But there’s no menu to study in mouthwatering detail. Size 14 girls need privacy to carry out their research. Here we were exposed to the harsh spotlight.
Humiliation came when the waitress brought over our tray of five puddings to taste (about £7 each) with a side order of cream and ice cream. “Look,” she guffawed. “There must be a mistake. No one would order this many desserts!”
Er, we did, we mumbled, blushing fiercely, as men from the next table looked over in horror. Most men don’t get desserts. It’s a biochemical thing.
But the first bite of lime meringue with vanilla mascarpone and gooseberry compôte restored our faith. The contrast between the sweetness of the slightly artifical green meringue and the tart, fresh gooseberry was thrilling. I hardly needed to try anything else.
My friend (currently doing a PhD on food in the novels of Joseph Conrad) was stricter. She pronounced the lime meringue a bit “spearminty” but raved over the “intense chocolate hit” of the chocolate fudge cake.
“Keep your critical faculties intact,” she hissed, offering me spoonfuls of carrot cake (slightly dry) and strawberry tart (delicious, but the sort you can get in any department store). We loved the fresh berries that came with each dessert, but mourned the loss of the sweet trolley — it’s more fun to make up the menu as you go along, rather than ordering in one greedy rush.
As for Kettner’s itself, we couldn’t help noticing only a few tables were occupied by 10pm. Blame the new decor? Personally I rather like Crawford’s French-Scandawegian interior but you would never get me sitting at the long marble counter that runs down the centre of the restaurant. It’s clearly meant for solo diners in a recession but solo Sex and the City girls are never going to want to spoon down dessert perched on impossibly high stools as the nosy revellers of Soho peer in through the window. Not even if it is sublime lime meringue and gooseberry compôte.
Details are correct at the time of publication - please check with venue before booking.
