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'Bush' and 'Blair' special relationship revealed

By Valentine Low, Evening Standard Last updated at 13:46pm on 11.10.06

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Knee trembler: fresh from the sauna, 'George Bush' appears unusually forward with 'Tony Blair'

Pick-up line: 'You all right back there, Spotty? Oh, and you, Blair'

Winning his spurs: a tender scene demonstrating their closeness

Well, they said it was a special relationship.

Here are George Bush and Tony Blair sharing a particularly tender moment as they enjoy an intimate little singalong at the President's Texas ranch.

"Blair, could you play Home On The Range just one more time? You played it with such... feeling."

"Well, er, George, er, Mr President, er, Sir, I would love to. Gosh. Crikey. But, er, wouldn't you rather hear my Stairway To Heaven? My Whole Lotta Love really rocks, you know."

"No, Blair, you just stick to Home On The Range - you know, the version I like, with the extra verse: 'Oh give me a home where the buffalo roam and I'll send in the US marines to kick some ass'."

"George, do you know your hand is on my knee?"

"No, but if you play it I'm sure I'll soon pick it up."

Of course, if anyone suspects these pictures are not what they seem and that in fact it is not the real President and Prime Minister making beautiful music together - well, they have a point.

The picture of Mr Blair riding in the back of the presidential pick-up with Mr Bush's springer spaniel Spotty is clearly ridiculous, isn't it?

Everyone knows that Mr Bush's dogs travel with him in the front.

Only poodles and lapdogs go in the back (the fact that Spotty actually died three years ago is a small oversight).

Then there is the image of Mr Bush using Mr Blair to get a leg-up on to his horse - clearly another obvious fake. It is patently implausible that President Bush would entrust Prime Minister Blair with a position of such responsibility.

We are sorry to have to tell you but that pesky Alison Jackson - the one who did all those fake pictures of Sven-Goran Eriksson and the Beckhams - has been up to her tricks again.

These pictures are taken from her book, to be published next year.

(Just a little thing, Alison. Next time, get the dog right.)

The complete set of pictures can been seen in the November issue of Harper's Bazaar, on sale tomorrow.