Critics' Choice

Film

Derek Malcolm

quote The whole thing blasts the eye and at times half deafens the ear quote

Speed Racer Restaurants

Fay Maschler

quote Hix Oyster and Chop House aims to invoke London dining in the 18th century quote

Hix Oyster & Chop House Comedy

Bruce Dessau

quote From the moment he ambled onstage it was clear that he deserves his fame quote

Sean Lock

Reader reviews

Theatre

Selwyn, Epsom

quote Why oh why didn't I take up the offer of leaving in the interval? quote

Gone With The Wind Music

David, London

quote Kate is a good singer, very expressive, although not a great dancer quote

The Long Blondes Music

Dave J., London

quote This was a masterclass in funk, soul and R&B quote

Eric Burdon And War

Ronaldo's bombshell - I don't know whether I'll stay at United

Cristiano Ronaldo has thrown Manchester United’s Champions League Final preparations into disarray when he refused to commit his future to them. Sportsmail can reveal Real Madrid are prepared to pay Ronaldo a staggering salary of Ł200,000 a week to join them.. more | Add your view

FIA president Max Mosley frozen out by Monaco royal family

Max Mosley’s tenuous grip on the leadership of world motor sport was weakened — perhaps permanently — yesterday when the Monaco royal family, the Grimaldis, made it clear that he is not welcome at next Sunday’s showpiece grand prix. The president of the ruling body, the FIA, has been an international pariah since he was exposed in a Sunday newspaper indulging in a five-hour sado-masochistic orgy.. more | Add your view

WELCOME to the awards that matter - Hatchet's Heroes and Horrors ...
BIG up to Harry, Torres, Bruce and Keegan among others...
...but golden raspberries to the likes of Berbatov, Gallas, Spurs and Rooney

Hatchet Man is taking a well-earned break but, fear not, he's been sharpening his studs and will wade in with FA Cup and Champions League special columns next week. In the meantime, it's the awards season. We all know Cristiano Ronaldo is the best player but what about the awards that really matter – Hatchet’s Heroes and Horrors..... more | Add your view

Half-price dining

Book a table through This is London and get 50% off your bill at top restaurants

Online DVD rental

Get 30 days FREE unlimited DVD rental - sign up here

Portsmouth high-roller Distin is out to leave his marque on Wembley

Even for a legendary wheeler dealer like Portsmouth manager Harry Redknapp, getting his hands on a free Rolls-Royce must represent one of his best pieces of business.. more | Add your view

Rio Ferdinand signs Ł125,000-a-week United deal to keep him with Premier League champions until 2013

Rio Ferdinand has signed a new contract at Manchester United which will keep him at Old Trafford until 2013. The new deal effectively means Ferdinand will spend the remainder of his career with United .. more | Add your view

Celtic legend Tommy Burns dies aged 51 after battle with skin cancer

Tommy Burns has died after losing his long-running battle with cancer at the age of 51, Celtic said today... more | Add your view

Howson the hero as his double puts Leeds into League One play-off final

Jonathan Howson was 12 when Leeds prepared for the Champions League semi-final in 2001. On Thursday night, he breathed life into their more modest dream of returning to the second tier of English football.. more | Add your view

Huddlestone and Walcott make their case to watching Capello

Fabio Capello was at Wrexham on Thursday night to see two of his promoted youngsters shoot England to this friendly victory.. more | Add your view

Coppell to stay for one more season at Reading

Steve Coppell will see out the remaining year of his contract Reading after considering his future following relegation.. more | Add your view

Liverpool eye Espanyol winger Albert Riera

Liverpool are interested in Espanyol winger Albert Riera and are willing to offer cash plus Sebastian Leto on loan.. more | Add your view

Eriksson turns down Benfica and Mexico as he waits for Manchester City sack

Sven Goran Eriksson has decided to snub Benfica and the Mexico national team and wait for ‘bigger offers’ as he prepares to leave Manchester City.. more | Add your view

Forest in the hunt for Ł4m Sheffield United striker James Beattie

Nottingham Forest may make an audacious approach for Sheffield United’s Ł4million striker James Beattie.. more | Add your view

Barcelona want to buy back Manchester United's Ł4m-rated defender Gerard Pique

Barcelona want to strike a Ł4million deal with Manchester United to buy back unsettled central defender Gerard Pique.. more | Add your view

Former Isle of Man TT winner Robert Dunlop dies in horrific crash

Former Isle of Man TT winner Robert Dunlop died tonight after a horrific crash during a practice race in Northern Ireland.. more | Add your view

Tartan Bearer gives Stoute a Derby boost after winning York's Dante Stakes

Tartan Bearer has powered into the Derby picture as ante-post favourite Twice Over exited stage left at York yesterday. A head victory from Frozen Fire in the Dante Stakes under Ryan Moore propelled Sir Michael Stoute’s colt into 5-1 favouritism for the Epsom Classic in some books.. more | Add your view

Stunning letter from Balco supplier Victor Conte reveals true extent of sprinter Dwain Chambers' drug use

Dwain Chambers will present a doping manual to Britain's drug testers today that may embarrass them as much as it helps their cause. Chambers will give John Scott, Britain's anti-doping chief, at a meeting in UK Sport's London headquarters a devastating letter from Victor Conte, his US drug supplier, detailing what Chambers took, the amounts and the schedule of use employed to avoid detection by the testing system.. more | Add your view

Tickets deals & Offers

I'm a keeper, so no wonder I'm misunderstood, says Arsenal's Lehmann as he makes his exit from North London

Jens Lehmann is not convinced by the claim that England once produced the best goalkeepers in the world. ‘Every country thinks that,’ he says. ‘The Germans think that, the Spanish think that and the Italians are also very proud of their keepers.’.. more | Add your view

Hot gossip: Latest transfer tidbits from around the League

West Ham could land Ł4m-rated midfielder Mark Bresciano if they follow up their initial inquiry, say Palermo. Burnley's pay-as-you play deal has failed to tempt Andy Cole, who was released by Sunderland... more | Add your view

Spurs set to make Ł6million bid for Bolivia striker Moreno

Brazilian club Cruzeiro expect Tottenham to make a bid upwards of Ł6million for Bolivia striker Marcelo Moreno. Alvimar Perrella, president of Cruzeiro, claims Spurs have had an offer turned down for the 20-year-old, with Shakhtar Donetsk putting in the highest bid so far .. more | Add your view

It is my dream to play for Barcelona, says Adebayor

Emmanuel Adebayor has come out with a gushing appreciation of Barcelona, insisting no player could turn down the chance to play for the Catalan giants. Sportsmail exclusively revealed last week how Adebayor had asked for Ł80,000 a week to stay with Arsenal.. more | Add your view

Murray a 'miserable git', claims Henman

Tim Henman, who joins the BBC Wimbledon commentary team this year having retired from competitive tennis, has at last been drawn into giving an opinion on his successor as Britain’s No 1, Andy Murray — and described him as a 'miserable git'.. more | Add your view

Wembley loses Ł21million

Wembley Stadium made an operating loss of Ł21.4million last year, it was confirmed today. The loss does not include interest payments on the Ł346million loan the Football Association owe on the stadium.. more | Add your view

Rampaging Tigers end Boothroyd's dream of bouncing straight back to Premier League

Hull has never seen a night quite like it, but then it shouldn't have. Not in 104 years of trying has the top tier of English football burned so brightly into focus. Keeping a lid on expectation for nine days will be the greatest challenge of Phil Brown's brief managerial career.. more | Add your view

Igor blimey, we lost! Punchless Rangers are run ragged by Russians as Denisov ruins big day

There is nothing worse than leaving a major final knowing you have let yourself down, but that is the dreadful reality facing Rangers this morning after a UEFA Cup Final which seemed to pass by without them noticing. To lose is one thing. To lose like this is quite another. Walter Smith’s team were dreadful last night in Manchester.. more | Add your view

Manchester police chiefs left 'sickened and disappointed' by rioting Rangers fans

Police chiefs said they were 'sickened and disappointed' after hours of violence following the UEFA Cup final marred what should have been a proud night for British football .. more | Add your view

Derby's demise softened by Ł2.6m per point

The pain of Derby’s wretched season in the Barclays Premier League will be eased considerably by the fact that they have banked more than Ł2.6million per point. Paul Jewell’s team finished bottom of the table with an all-time low of just 11 points, winning only one of their 38 games, but received a windfall of over Ł29m in prize money and TV revenue for their miserable efforts.. more | Add your view