Poulter's bare-faced cheek is no threat for King Tiger

As you may have noticed, the Scot, who reached that age of apparent dread last June, has been quietly piecing his career together after a horrific run of missed halfway cuts last season.

A low-key draw for the first two rounds of this week's Dubai Desert Classic would have suited, to build on last week's top-six finish in Qatar.

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Who has he got? Only the man who gave up being low-key around the time he learned to walk.

Yes, Tiger Woods is in town, and let's hope the cream of the home crop, including Europe's very own answer to Rory Sabbatini, the body-baring Ian Poulter (of whom, more later), can put up a better show than their American counterparts have been doing recently.

'No-one should win tournaments by eight shots,' said Niclas Fasth, Tiger's other playing partner here. But in the U.S. that has become almost the norm during four successive victories for Woods, including one by that amount in California on Sunday.

Thomas Bjorn, who once went toe-to-toe with the great man over four rounds in Dubai and won, believes there is more chance of a close contest here than in America. 'We don't see him every week, so players raise their games,' he said. 'We have seen it in the past from people like Henrik Stenson, Lee Westwood and me.'

That said, the Dane believes the margins are getting bigger because Woods is improving all the time.

'I honestly think he lives by the creed of making each day that little bit better than the one before,' he said. 'For the rest of us, I believe the sooner you come to the realisation that the best you can be is the world No 2, the more chance you have of fulfilling your potential. For those who cling to the thought that they can become world No 1, good luck.

But you won't beat him.'

The last time Monty and Woods walked the fairways together there were people hanging from the rafters at St Andrews during a memorable third-round battle in the 2005 Open that the Scot actually edged by a stroke. Tiger, naturally, went on to win the war.

Perhaps Monty can draw from that occasion rather than from the first time he partnered Woods, when he fell into the trap that has snared so many since. The final group out on the third day of the 1997 Masters, Woods shot 65 and Monty 74.

'The worst thing you can do is what I did at Augusta and try to beat him at his own game,' admitted Montgomerie. 'I tried to hit the ball like Tiger and lost my rhythm. The only thing you can do is try to come in with a lower score. As for this occasion, it will be interesting for me to judge where I am in terms of my progress, after eight under-par rounds so far this year. It will be an education. You are never too old to learn, even at 44.'

Given that he has never won a tournament in which Woods has competed, there is one obvious thing he could learn.

Woods has shown his respect for Monty by inviting him to play in his own tournament in California when his world ranking didn't merit inclusion, in 2004 and again last December.

'I think it goes back to the Ryder Cup in 1999, when Paul Lawrie and I had a great match against him and Steve Pate,' said Monty. No prizes for guessing the Scots won that one, 2&1.

Respect for Poulter, meanwhile, was in short supply after he made a prat of himself in a golf magazine feature — and not just for posing naked on the cover. To paraphrase: Poulter, taking a leaf out of Sabbatini's book of self-delusion, doesn't rate anyone bar Tiger and believes that when he reaches his potential the pair will be streets ahead. As you can imagine, his proclamations provoked much mirth on the practice ground, not to mention ridicule.

It was all a contrast to Woods, of course, who never strays into controversial terrain. What do you ask the man who has been asked every conceivable golf question? After 20 minutes going over heavily trodden ground, I asked him about the black U.S. presidential hopeful, Barack Obama.

'Oh God, here we go,' began Woods. Thereafter stock words such as 'inspirational' tumbled forth and it was hard not to smile when he said he admired the way that 'politicians think on their feet'.

This, from golf's consummate politician: the man who has mastered the art of answering questions while saying very little.

Perhaps we shouldn't be too hard on Poulter, after all.

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