Tonight:
8°c
Does the European Commission watch Strictly Come Dancing? Because if they did, they might appreciate the two steps forward, one step back nature of what is actually being imposed on the UK this week.
Alistair Darling may try and sound upbeat about the creation of the three High Street banking brands from the wreckage of the credit crunch, but nobody should be fooled — this is Brussels extracting a forfeit from Darling for being allowed to rescue Lloyds-HBOS, RBS and Northern Rock.
One of them, Williams & Glyn's, is not even new. It disappeared from our streets in 1985.
The consumer will benefit from a degree of increased competition, as the trio set out their wares. But in terms of market share, they will probably struggle.
They will have to take on the established big boys of the sector: HSBC, Barclays and Santander. Meanwhile, another giant, Tesco, seems intent on doing its own thing, of recruiting customers for its new bank when they visit its supermarkets.
Those that declare an interest in buying, in the forced absence of HSBC, Barclays and Santander (the Spaniards won't be allowed to buy the retail operations), and the likely voluntary exclusion of Tesco, are likely to be foreign and Virgin. Sir Richard Branson's Virgin Money may yet emerge with the “good” part of Northern Rock, a result that was on the cards when the bank first hit trouble three years ago.
Despite the best efforts of the Government to put a brave face on what they're doing, this is not so much a glamorous auction with determined bidders, high reserved prices and dizzying bids, as an offloading of unwanted goods in a parking lot on a wet Sunday morning.
There will be some takers but not enough to make much difference to the nation's desperate finances. In private, Darling and his Treasury colleagues will not be reaching for even a celebratory bottle of warm cava after this car boot sale.
