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We don't want to meet our son's killer
Rob Singh, Evening Standard15 Apr 2008
The parents of a soldier stabbed to death as he walked his dog have spurned his reformed killer's offer to meet them.
Former Coldstream Guard Christopher Barrell was killed 17 years ago after he was involved in a fight with three men near his family's home in Romford.
The 21-year-old, who had survived tours of duty in Northern Ireland, was stabbed in the stomach with a lock knife and died in hospital.
A year later, 17-year-old Desmond Brown walked free on probation from the Old Bailey after admitting manslaughter.
Brown claimed in court that Mr Barrell had started the fight. He said he was only carrying the knife for his own protection but has since admitted he had wanted to be intimidating.
Today, the killer is a father-of-four and youth pastor at a Christian youth club in Walthamstow who speaks in schools about the dangers of knife crime.
He said recently he hoped to meet Mr Barrell's parents, Carol and Peter, adding: "I'm not expecting forgiveness. If there's anything they want to say or vent, I'll take it on the chin. Somebody had to die for me to realise that carrying a knife is never the answer."
But the couple, who are now both in their sixties, said they were "cynical" about Brown's claims to be reformed.
Mr Barrell, a retired Met detective superintendent, said: "I don't think I could ever forgive him.
"I want to forget him. Meeting him would achieve nothing. If he has truly turned his life around, good luck to him but he hasn't turned mine round.
"My way of keeping Desmond Brown out of my life and thoughts is to airbrush him out and honour the name of my son. If he is sincere and trying to set other people on a better path I condone that, but in the back of my mind I will always be cynical. He was just a nasty boy."
Brown spoke candidly about the fight in St Chad's Park, Chadwell Heath, in 1991.
He said: "Carrying a knife was about creating an image. It was a choice I made because it was attractive. It was about not being intimidated but being the intimidator. I had a reputation as someone that got into fights and that gave me an ego boost. The guy got stabbed for staring at my friend. He started shouting and swearing and battered my friend. Then he came and told me to f**k off. He swung for me and I pulled out a knife and stabbed him."
Mr Barrell, who now lives in Kent, said: "He is still fabricating my son's death. The reason my son got killed was because one of his young friends kicked our dog.
"My son was a respectable young man, he'd served six years in the Army, and he said, 'What's going on?' His [Brown's] story of the incident is manipulated. No matter how he's turned his life round he's still making excuses. It's not the truth."
He added: "The thing that riles me is that he never got punished. He walked out of the Old Bailey with probation. He and his family were whooping and cheering."
Since Christopher's death, the Barrells and their other sons, Ian, 39, and Andy, 41, have raised more than £300,000 for children's charities.
Mr Barrell said: "It's a positive way to remember my son."
Reader views (5)
We've all made mistakes in life and although i havent been in any situation such as Desmond's. I'm sure he regrets what he has done. He came to my school recently and explained himself. he told us all the details and all his reasons for doing it. he agreed his reasons were pathetic but as a teenager myself i can understand why he made the decisions he made. not saying i will follow what he has done in the past, because he has taught me today that there is a better way to live without being such a dangerous lifestyle. the lifestyle being lived by boys in my school are now also changing because he has answered their questions on what the consequences are to the crimes they may plan to commit. they have confessed they know people who carry knives and that they've been involved in incedences such as this. its not something someone should be hated for although everyone have a reason for the way they feel towards something. he has apologised and has been doing all he can to teach young people like myself that there is no need for conflict and drama when there is education and a happy lifestyle on the other hand. he knows he can't take back what he's done and we should all consider that also, that no matter how much we decide to dislike him for his actions our hate will not bring someone back from the dead. also as a christian i am taught to forgive and see the best in people. having met Desmond, i see he is now a changed man who is kind and understandingly genuine.
- Destiny Stars, London, 10/12/2009 12:50
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Perhaps some new forensic process and evidence is available to re open this case and get justice .
- Godfrey James, Colchester essex, 21/10/2009 16:59
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How nice for Desmond Brown that he was given the opportunity to "reform".
- Alex, London, 21/10/2009 15:59
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To the parents of Chris I went to school with Chris and he was one of the nicest blokes there, there was no way he provoked a fight it was not his way I accidentally injured Chris in the knee while playing in a district football game many years before and he never held this against me in any way. I found at the time to be a very honourably way of dealing with the event. To think that this scum bag Brown wants to see you is for his benefit only and sickens me, I believe that Christopher's memory should be left untarnished and Brown should crawl back to where he come from and stop spouting insensitive rubbish trying to hide the fact that he is no more than a cowardly killer who I think should still be banged up now as he is still assaulting your memories to this day.
- Richard Bull, cambridgeshire, 21/10/2009 15:59
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Desmond Brown states that he stabbed the victim because the victim stared at his mate. How pathetic does this sound. This is nothing new, killers always blame their victims. Many years ago around 1985, I visited Maidstone prison's life wing which was mostly populated by young prisoners, they all blamed the victim for the death, ie if he had not fought back I would not be in here; he should have given me his money. When I asked. They are all basically cowards. Desmond Brown is also a coward, he was part of a gang when he killed Christopher Barrell. I would like to know what he and his family think about their behaviour in court when he was sentenced to probation, which was disgusting.
- Vera, London England, 21/10/2009 15:59
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