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Every man, at some stage of his life, feels irresistibly compelled to grow a beard or moustache. We know it's wrong. We know that only a very few blokes - Rowan Atkinson, Kris Kristofferson, Bill Oddie - look better with facial hair. We know that the daily shave represents a triumph over our primitive selves. But still. The lure of physiognomic fuzz can be a powerful one.
Facial topiary, however patchy, denotes earnestness and independence. In the office, it suggests you are not bound by the conventions of corporate smartness demanded of the average wage slave. In the creative sphere, it shows you are more concerned with art than with your clean-cut commercial image.
Tellingly, Hollywood favourites Jude Law and Josh Hartnett both sported take-me-seriously wispy beards at yesterday's Evening Standard Theatre Awards. George Clooney and Brad Pitt have also both fuzzed up recently in a bid to disguise their beauty.
Transvestite comedian Eddie Izzard grows a goatee when he's "going through a butch phase" or bidding for mainstream roles. Guy Ritchie is courting post-divorce credibility (and covertly promoting his forthcoming Sherlock Holmes movie) by sporting a variation on the Victorian mutton-chop.
And it's not just stars who feel the pull of the full follicle. This month, lots of ordinary, formerly bare-faced men (and, apparently, some women) are letting their moustaches grow in aid of the prostate cancer charity Movember. This follows in the footsteps of a similar charitable stunt called Tacheback. Clearly, we men will surrender to our stubble for a good cause. Or even a bad one. Trust me, I know.
My father is lavishly bearded, but I've only ever been able to grow a sort of weird Amish chinstrap. By the time I was 30 I'd given up on facial hair. Then one day my wife and I decided to host a Hallowe'en fancy dress party as Gomez and Morticia Addams. She decided to wear a wig. I took it more seriously.
After weeks of secret cultivation, I unveiled my budding pencil moustache to some friends. "Oh, the tango teacher's arrived," said one, sarcastically. At the party, it was still so scanty I had to fill it in with mascara. An evening of derision reminded me of the time I'd asked the actors from the 118 118 adverts if their moustaches were real. "No, they're crepe!" one replied. Mine too, boys, mine too.
Reader views (2)
Indeed, surely you should know. Good cleanly shaven friends of mine are now growing moustaches in aid of prostate cancer.
If Jude is growing it for fun (or warmth)....he should be made aware of the fact that he can help this charity by encouraging his many friends to sponsor him.
- Beverley, Berkshire, 25/11/2008 20:14
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Its because its MOVEMBER ---- for charity in November for cancer - mens grow tashes..................
- Hannah, London UK, 25/11/2008 14:11
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