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That's just a tattoo too far, Peaches
Esther Walker17.02.09
A wise old man once told me that tattoos are like cats: the more of them you have, the weirder you are. That must make Peaches Geldof, who revealed her 20 tattoos on a beach in South America, certifiable.
Among others, she has some lyrics to a Nick Cave song on her back and a daisy chain from breast to knee.
Angelina Jolie is also, famously, magnificently decorated (and, also, not the most balanced of personalities). She has the birthplace co-ordinates of her six children on her arm, "Know your rights" on the back of her neck and, below that, revealed by a low-backed dress at last week's Bafta's, a prayer in Sanskrit. That's only about a quarter of her total collection.
But most people stop at one. For a start, it hurts. I had some small stars drawn on my hip about 10 years ago and all I remember about the process was trying not to punch the tattoo "artist" in a yowling pain-rage. It bleeds, too. Then it scabs over and itches. Then the stupid thing goes blue like a swallow on a lorry driver's hand.
Why did I get it? I still don't know. There is a theory that getting tattoos is a sign of insecurity: you decorate yourself because you believe that your natural body isn't enough.
Just look (and then stagger back in horror) at Amy Winehouse, an open self-harmer, self-hater and basket-case - and with more doodles on her than a schoolgirl's roughbook.
It used to be that tattoos were for the armed forces and criminals only; now, getting a "fashion tattoo" is unremarkable. Encouraged by celebrities like Sienna Miller, who has three quite pretty stars on her shoulder, and Cheryl Cole who has, among others, a little decorative squiggle on the side of her hand, the British public has taken to body art with gusto.
And if Samantha Cameron, wife of the Conservative party leader, creative director of Smythson and daughter of a baronet, can have a little dolphin tattoo on her ankle to remind her of a carefree youth, it must be OK.
Personally, I think a bit of discreet body art here or there is all right. I have even promised my boyfriend to get his name written on my bottom if we marry. The stars will have to go first, though - more than one tattoo would just be weird.
Reader views (9)
People don't get tattoos because they think they're not beautiful enough without them, they get them as memorials, souvenirs, or, as i did, get them just to prove they can get them done. i'm a firm believer in 'try everything once' and therefore, i got my tattoo because it made me feel good about being able to cross off one more thing off of the list of things i want to do. you only live once.
- Cheryl, uk
I really think you have to be a bit thick to lacerate yourself. When I see the sort of people who go around covered in tats I feel justified in my thoughts.
- Cyrjames, Berwick-Upon-Tweed, UK.
To L of London - I'll join you on your hundredth birthday, in the two-member "No Tattoos Club". You could also become an honorary member with my wife and I of the "Never Been, Never Going, to Bali Club".
On a more serious note, one tattoo is more than enough, so don't do it.
- James Wells, Perth, Australia
I figure at the rate I'm going I'll probably get an award when I'm 100 for being the only person left on the planet with absolutely no tattoos or piercings. I contemplated getting a tattoo when I was 19 - I sure am glad I never did.
- L, London
Ok, maybe 20 tattoos are a bit too much, but I think that everybody has the right to do whatever they like with their body. I have two… and "the process" wasn't that painful as you say so, but you're right about one thing ... the colour does turn to blue sooner or later
- Ms. Eb, London, UK
women should realise that if they have a tattoo on the base of the spine they cannot have an epidural in labour. Piercings and tattoos are dangerous as well; my son had to have a heart valve replaced because of an infected piercing in his chin which caused septacaemia. He very nearly died and doctors have warned him not to have any piercings or tattoos in the future. In due time he will have to be on warfarin. Be warned.
- Sally Brooks, uk
but what will they look like when she's 50, not so healthy and not so attractive?
- Foxy, Newcastle upon Tyne, UK
At least they're mostly attractive tattoos, on a body that's healthy and attractive.
- Mel, Richmond
daughter of a baronet or not, a tattoo can only be distasteful.
- Concerned, Caerleon, South Wales
