Tonight:
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The great novel of transgression, Lolita, begins with a fictional foreword by one John Ray Jr, PhD, who writes that the novel's account by self-confessed paedophile Humbert Humbert “should make all of us — parents, social workers, educators — apply ourselves with still greater vigilance and vision to the task of bringing up a better generation in a safer world”.
Even knowing the furore that his novel would cause, Vladimir Nabokov couldn't resist teasing such “educators” and their discomfort with sex.
That rule book was thrown out this week by Terence Kealey, vice chancellor of Buckingham University. In a piece for the Times Educational Supplement on the Seven Deadly Sins of the Academy, Kealey pronounced that for male academics, gorgeous, awestruck female students are simply a “perk” of the job.
“Normal girls are more interested in pecs than specs … but nonetheless, most male lecturers know that, most years, there will be a girl in class who flashes her admiration and who asks for advice on her essays. What to do? Enjoy her!” he writes. And any prof should feel free to “admire daily” her curves, if only “to spice up your sex, nightly, with the wife”. Yuck.
It's as though Kealey seems never to have come across any female scholars: women in the academy are just there as sex objects or adoring “acolytes”. As the case of teacher Helen Goddard getting jazzy with a 15-year-old pupil shows, anything remotely near Humbert Humbert underage remains one of our final taboos. But the same can't be said of tutor-student relationships, which without a hint of impropriety, are in the first place, based on intellectual intimacy.
If that becomes something else, though not ideal (and something of a cliché) I would at least hope that it's a little bit more complex than the straightforward Ivory Tower-chase-me-around-the-library titillation he evokes.
The most dangerous thing about his dubious thesis is that it is likely to inspire the kind of thinking commonplace in US universities, where there now tends to be an “open door” policy: a male professor alone with a female student has to leave the door open, to prevent the university from being sued. It would be a great shame if British universities went the same way. For such a mindset also frowns on the very idea of a cerebral relationship between a tutor and student: not a vice, but supposedly the greatest virtue of the academy.
As the Government worries about the bill for higher education, a vice chancellor suggesting the idea that student enthusiasm is a ruse for seducing a hapless professor is not exactly the greatest of ads.
Front-row seats for the Wintour of discontent
Seated next to American Vogue's Anna Wintour at a show this week, Pixie Geldof and Alexa Chung reportedly wriggled, giggled and hugged each other throughout. Wintour was heard to say that it was a fashion show, “not a sixth-form lunch break”.
Ouch. Does the fashion world keep everyone on their toes by wilfully striking names off lists and jumbling up the seating plans?
My Fashion Week disaster came on being told at the Matthew Williamson show on a Sunday afternoon that my name wasn't on the list. After a frenzy of texting, I found a friend to rescue me from the street.
At the opposite extreme, at the Fashion Fringe show on Tuesday, somebody accidentally sat me next to fashion god Roland Mouret. I was touched to see that he's not so famous that he doesn't excitedly rummage through a goody bag. Getting an air kiss from the inventor of the Galaxy dress was definitely my highlight of the week.
Vroom with a view from a different world
I am not a fan of Formula 1 and yet it's hard not to watch open-mouthed at the fall of Flavio Briatore, principal of the Renault F1 team.
Even before the so-called “Crashgate” fiasco, the Italian playboy and sometime associate of Italian prime minister Silvio Berlusconi seemed beyond the realms of reality. His clothing line, Billionaire, suggests that there are people who would want to be emblazoned with that logo — although since last autumn it has offered almost permanent discount offers.
It's also the name of his nightclub in Sardinia, where near-constant heroic footage of the fabulous life of Flavio and his F1 glory played all night long when I visited it early this year. There is even a “vroom-vroom” sound-effect that signifies his presence in the club.
When contacted last week, clearly following the PR advice of his pal Silvio, Flavio is reported to have said that everything is still “fantastico”. As ever, his perspective is unique.
The art world needs cash
To the boardroom of UBS, to help arts organisations learn how to pitch for money and sponsorship, by taking part in a “Dragon's Den”. Looking out over the Gherkin, with tens of thousands worth of Gary Hume paintings on the wall, galleries, part of a group called Contemporary Row, tried to entice us to spend.
When cuts, cuts, cuts is the news agenda, galleries and museums get a tough press for having financial needs. To sit and listen to five directors and curators who live breathe and sleep not-for-profit spaces gave me a real sense of perspective. I did my best to roar, but as arts budgets get more and more squeezed, it was hard not to be impressed.
Reader views (3)
A slew of limericks beginning "There was an old don at Buckingham..." seems inevitable.
- Mark, London, 24/09/2009 19:26
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It's a bit sad when you can't write what was obviously intended as a tongue in cheek essay without the world and her significant other getting on their high horse. "I may not agree with what you say, but I will defend with my life your right to say it." - Voltaire must be getting quite giddy in his grave.
- Paul, London, 24/09/2009 16:03
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Regarding tutor-student relationships - the age of consent in this country is 16 - university students have a minimum age of 18 - they are adults - what's the problem?
- Tony, London, 24/09/2009 14:26
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